Saturday, January 29, 2011

People Who Rock. People Who Suck.

Better late than never, right?? Because I'm so excited about the Hoyas, this might be a little Gtown heavy. But cmon now. I went to a D3 college, I deserve good things from my D1 grad school!

People Who Rock:
  1. Austin Freeman baby. Not only does he have my old number, but he's also like the biggest teddy bear and I want to kiss him. Plus, you know, he got THIRTY ONE POINTS today against Nova;
  2. Chris Wright. He didn't score today but he was like the beating heart (whilst Austin and Vaughn, Clark and Lubick were the extremities, and Vee and Hollis were the... I've run out of metaphor material. Point is, I love them all) of the team. Annnnd also, I don't care how much younger than me he is, I'd totally bang him if I thought it was remotely a possibility;
  3. Jon Stewart. LOVING the takedown of Megyn Kelly/Fox News overall. Shitheads gotta get called out!! And Jon is doing it;
  4. The writers of Law and Order, wherever you are, for giving me something to do at work. Also, you know, Jerry Orbach (and Chris Noth, Benjamin Bratt, and Jesse Martin) and Sam Waterston (plus Jill Hennessy, Carey Lowell, Angie Harmon, Elizabeth Rohm, Annie Parisse and Alana de la Garza) for the same reason. Please all come back? Please?;
  5. Peaceful protestors across the world (spec. Tunisia, Egypt, Yemen, Jordan and Lebanon this week) who demand change from oppression. While the trials these people are facing vary from country to country and from person to person, the message I am hearing is this: oppress your people, and you will pay. Period;
  6. JK Rowling. Am finishing the series again. It is still amazing. Maybe more so. I love her; and
  7. Did I mention the Hoyas? All of them? And John Thompson III? Cause if I didn't, HOYA SAXA!
People Who Suck:
  1. My ex boss;
  2. The Pitt fans who screwed with me at the Gtown-Pitt game. I cannot wait to see the rematch. And pull that one girl's hair;
  3. Robert Duvalier (on a more serious note);
  4. Walid Jumblatt (still trying to add gravity);
  5. Chris Christie. Either until he fucking stops hating on cops and teachers (the very people who you know, MAKE SOCIETY RUN IN A CIVIL WAY), he is number five on the people who suck list. Because he sucks, times five;
  6. People who are mean to the homeless; and
  7. The dude at Safeway who flipped out at an old man who didn't realize the self checkout line was in the next aisle. A simple "excuse me sir, but this is the line" would have sufficed. No need to call him words that shocked me for their violence.
It was a sorta weird week apparently, given the above. I'm back on Monday, and ready and raring to go. Upcoming posts: the cost of weddings, updates on relationship with Grad School Ex and you know, a bunch of other silliness that matters probably just to me! YEEHAW!!

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Hey yo, MTV!

Send ME to Italy.

I'm from NJ, being going to the shore since I was, well, born, and have a vowel at the end of my last name (AND my first name. Whoaaaa!!). More than that - hey hey - my dad is legit FROM Italy. And like Vinny, I have a bunch of family in Southern Italy who would LOVE for me come by for a big "dinner della famiglia".

That's family dinner, bee tee dubs.

I mean, sure, you could do the obvious and show how even though all the Jersey Shore characters say they're Italian, they're really just guidos. You could highlight the horrified looks that Snooki will get for her sartorial choices in one of the most fashionable countries in the world. You could show Mike "the Situation" that Italians don't really like gyms, or laundry - and some of them really hate tanning. You could let Vinny go looking for "sum chicken parm" which isn't actually an Italian dish. You could happily juxtapose JWoww and Sammi against Italian women who live by "la bella figura" rule, and make all of them look like big old assholes.

Not that they need any of your help.

And then you could let them, once again, make my state and my ethnicity (because I too am an Italo-American) look stupid for the benefit of the nation. And by "the nation" I mean "my friends, coworkers, and family not from NJ who hungrily look to me for even the most remote weakness for anything they see on your show in Sleazeside Heights."

Or?

You could send me! I promise to drink too much and act sorta like a jerk. I don't dress like I'm from NY (or Rome for that matter), and I definitely get an obnoxious accent when I speak Italian. I could run around Italy hitting on super hot Italian men and getting turned down because I'm a little dumpy like their Nonnas! It could be GREAT. We could call it "Jersey on Chianti" or something, and if you really want, I can absolutely go back to NJ and hang out at the beach - on you - for a summer. No problema. I'll go by MA, "la tifosa di vino".

Ok, we'll work on it.

But seriously. Can you please stop. I love New Jersey. I love the shore. I love being Italian-American, and I love Italy. Your show cuts me man. It cuts me REAL deep. A season of Snooki et al. butchering Italian and asking for some spaghet and meatballs with some mozzadel on it (eeey Joeeeeey) makes me want to hide under the covers listening to Andrea Bocelli while eating saltimbocca and not answering calls from snarktastic friends/fam/strangers. You can make it up to me, however, by sending ME to Italy.

I'll give YOU a "situazione".

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Effing Hu Jintao

Every single effing time he wants to effing go anywhere, he needs an effing motorcade. That means every effing five minutes there are effing sirens ricocheting down Calvert and into my cabeza. He effing has a shit ton of protestors AND adorers, because they are all effing up in my peace at the Woodley Park metro. And today, I had to effing go into work for the first time in effing forever and the DCeffingPD had closed off ALL the EFFING streets so he could go by.

I'm all for bilateral relations, but for eff's sake Hu Jintao, next time stay in NE.

Monday, January 17, 2011

So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire.

Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of their captivity.

But one hundred years later, the Negro still is not free. One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languishing in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land. So we have come here today to dramatize a shameful condition.

In a sense we have come to our nation's capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men, yes, black men as well as white men, would be guaranteed the unalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check, a check which has come back marked "insufficient funds." But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. So we have come to cash this check — a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice. We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to lift our nation from the quick sands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of God's children.

It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment. This sweltering summer of the Negro's legitimate discontent will not pass until there is an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality. Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, but a beginning. Those who hope that the Negro needed to blow off steam and will now be content will have a rude awakening if the nation returns to business as usual. There will be neither rest nor tranquility in America until the Negro is granted his citizenship rights. The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges.

But there is something that I must say to my people who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice. In the process of gaining our rightful place we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred.

We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force. The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed the Negro community must not lead us to a distrust of all white people, for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny. They have come to realize that their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom. We cannot walk alone.

As we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead. We cannot turn back.

There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, "When will you be satisfied?" We can never be satisfied as long as the Negro is the victim of the unspeakable horrors of police brutality. We can never be satisfied, as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. We cannot be satisfied as long as the Negro's basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as our children are stripped of their selfhood and robbed of their dignity by signs stating "For Whites Only". We cannot be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until justice rolls down like waters and righteousness like a mighty stream.

I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow jail cells. Some of you have come from areas where your quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive.

Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to South Carolina, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed. Let us not wallow in the valley of despair.

I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal."

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification; one day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together.

This is our hope. This is the faith that I go back to the South with. With this faith we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.

This will be the day when all of God's children will be able to sing with a new meaning, "My country, 'tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the pilgrim's pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring."

And if America is to be a great nation this must become true. So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania!

Let freedom ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado!

Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California!

But not only that; let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia!

Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee!

Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring.

And when this happens, when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, "Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Someone's gotta say it

Let's be clear. No one but the sick, twisted Jared Loughner killed a 9 year old and three grandmothers in cold blood on Saturday. No one but the clearly afflicted with mental illness Jared Loughner attempted to assassinate a member of Congress, and tragically succeeded in assassinating a Federal judge and a Congressional staffer.

No one but the motherfucker that is Jared Loughner deserves the blame.

That hasn't stopped aspersions being cast all over the place. Sarah Palin's bullseye map (please Rebecca Mansour. I actually had some semblance of respect for you until this weekend, despite your employer), Keith Olbermann's "Worst Person in the World", hateful rhetoric from both sides.

And let's be honest - we have to talk, America. This has gotten out of hand.

But anyone - a WaPo "Right Turn" blogger on WAMU, Roger Ailes, Joe Schmoe at the bar - ANYONE who pretends that people portraying President Bush as a monkey is remotely the same as Sharon Angle's "Second Amendment solutions", anyone who is deluded enough to believe that "Bush=Hitler" even comes close to "Don't retreat - RELOAD!" (what it does come close to is "Obama=Hitler", btw)...

... in fact:

ANYONE who perpetuates the false equivalency that mainstream rhetoric from the left (eg, "General Betrayus" - MoveOn.org, "Bringing a gun to a knife fight" - Classic Chicago movie, the Untouchables. Oh wait no. Barack Obama) is the same as mainstream rhetoric from the right ("Does sharia law say we can behead Dana Milbank" - Bill O'Reilly; "I’m thinking about killing Michael Moore and I’m wondering if I could kill him myself, or if I would need to hire somebody to do it. No, I think I could. I think he could be looking me in the eye, you know, and I could just be choking the life out of him. Is this wrong?” - Glenn Beck; "I want people in Minnesota armed and dangerous on this issue of the energy tax because we need to fight back." - Representative Michele Bachmann) is lying to themselves, idiotic, deliberately missing the point or all three.

And it doesn't help.

So let's just go ahead and say this. Jared Loughner needs to be tried, convicted, and punished to the fullest extent of the law (personally, I think that that means lifetime imprisonment. Death penalty is too easy for him). Calling for manslaughter charges against Sarah Palin, a random DailyKos blogger, or anyone else really is incendiary and with no understanding of actual US law.

But don't try to pretend that the mainstream left soaks their words in as much violent rhetoric as the mainstream right. That's not doing anything for the victims, for their families, or for the rest of America as we try to fix the environment that existed before Saturday's tragedy.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Whatever happened to the Card Catalog??

So.

It's been a shitty couple of days, no? Personally, this has only been exacerbated by some not fun health stuff last week which is almost DEFINITELY OK (if it's not, I'm sure you'll hear about it on Wednesday when I get my results back) but my boss' reaction was unhelpful to my stress levels, to say the least.

And then you know, there was that thing in AZ on Saturday.

People who are prone to Depression (even on loads of lovely anti depressants) are sometimes more affected by shit like that than others. It's a problem of over-empathizing. This is not meant to sound like you know, depressed people are better that non depressed people, and in fact, this empathathon can actually be incredibly unhelpful when trying to deal with tragedies. But let's just say that this was a terrible tragedy, one that was a little too close to home for my own comfort, and all my thoughts and prayers are with the victims, families, and people who suffer from gun violence, who are afflicted with mental illness, and you know...

Everyone in America?

So instead of focusing on that, I'd like to ask - whatever happened to the card catalog!? I mean, I know what HAPPENED. Everything got digitized. Even way back when I was LEARNING the card catalog in elementary school my local library had already gone "on line" - a term I didn't even remotely understand - by having the entire county's database on a massive intranet. If my library didn't have the Babysitter's Club book I was looking for, all I had to do was find it somewhere in the system, type in my card number, and poof! It would show up in five days.

It was as awesome as Claudia Kishi's candy supply.

But still at school we learned it, and named fake books after ourselves so we could learn how things were filed. Author name, subject, and title. Three cards were written up, and filed away, and the school librarian promised we could come back when we were Big, Tall, Middle Schoolers and check and see ourselves in the system.

A 7-yr-old narcissist's dream!

Anyway, I'm wondering what's gone down with them. They can't still be all over the elementary school world, can they? It'd sorta be a waste of space. But what HAPPENED. Did they recycle the cards? Burn them? Are they in some historical museum for late 80s, early 90s elementary school memorabilia? If I went to this museum, would I be able to look up MA's Choice, by MA, subject: awesome??

Cause I would like to do that.

Any insight you guys can give me on that would make me quite pleased. It might even make me smile, despite potential health probs, and you know, the fact that the world is falling apart.

Friday, January 7, 2011

People Who Rock. People Who Suck.

People Who Rock:
  1. All my friends who volunteered to take me to the ER, for two reasons. I didn't NEED to go to the ER, and they were willing to take me anyway cause they thought it would make my life easier. The ER is, in my RA experience, a hellish terrible place. Unless you are a real emergency (and here I have to go to my mom's rules - are you bleeding? Is something on fire?) you sit there wasting away to nothing. These are true friends;
  2. Pres Obama. It's been a while since PWR PWS so this is for DADT, the Zadroga Bill and the New START treaty. Also, just for being him;
  3. Jon Stewart. See above;
  4. John Hickenlooper. Dude seems AWESOME according to the NYT profile, and I kinda wanna work for him;
  5. The random lady at Lufthansa who made sure my NYE didn't suck;
  6. You all!!!!; and
  7. Cory Booker. You running for gov or Senate Cory? You call me. Other than my fantabulous inapprops blogging abilities, I am actually remotely talented at some things. You don't have to pay me a lot. And I promise, I'll rock you out.
People Who Suck:
  1. On the other hand, Chris Christie (don't worry, he's still down list too) blows because he decided to go to Florida the same day the P of the S Senate declared a state of emergency in the Jerz. If your Lt Gov has to go to Mexico to attend to her dying dad, you stay in the state, ESP if a blizzard is forecast to rival that of 1996 (man. That was a great blizzard). You're a dumbass;
  2. My job;
  3. People who are hiring for other jobs who haven't hired me yet. Hello! Super fabness here! Or if not, I bake!;
  4. Stroga. Duh. Don't forget - Sunday at 4pm, Wednesday at 11;
  5. Chris Christie. Either until he fucking stops hating on cops and teachers (the very people who you know, MAKE SOCIETY RUN IN A CIVIL WAY), he is number five on the people who suck list. Because he sucks, times five;
  6. Delicious, but high caloric food; and
  7. My ovaries. Actually no, only my left one. Hello? Did I ever do anything to do? No! I treat you nice! I take Yasmin so you don't have to work too hard! Cmon now. Work with me here.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Update: AdMo fights BACK against Stroga

So.

A few weeks ago I proudly showed my crotchety old man stripes and posted about how Stroga plus Grey Goose vodka were ruining my sleeping patterns and chances for happiness by operating (under some shady permittage) The Grey Goose Mansion. We're talking raves until 3am in a completely NON sound proofed building that echoes across the street and alleyways that encourages people who are drunk as fuck to then get into fights (no joke - cat fight occurred where someone was PULLED out of a CAB), scream at passing cars, and pee all over public property.

Ugh.

It was an awful autumn, so I was thrilled when I found out that the Grey Goose nonsense was wrapping up on NYE. I made sure to be as far away from (you know) my HOUSE that night, said a quick thank you to my friend who let me crash (which was more than deserved when I heard that there was a fight in the alleyway after someone's car was towed (or attempted to be towed)). I blew a kiss to the sleep gods, and intended to go on my way.

Until Monday.

When a flyer appeared from Stroga appeared all around the area (including handed to me by my friend Ramona, thanks!) announcing a community meeting this Sunday, January 9 to discuss community concerns and upcoming events. I was horrified. Don't get me wrong - I suppose I appreciate that they're not going to simply carry on with business as usual, which means my reinforced noise blocking earphones (which by the way, are really difficult to sleep in) would get even more wear for the money.

However.

It does strike me as ever so slightly odd that this meeting is coming a few days before the community will have an official place to strike back. A week from today is a hearing in front of the alcohol licensing group for the District - ABRA - on Stroga-as-event-space. Here are the deets:

ABRA Hearing on Stroga

January 12, 2011
11am
1250 U St NW, 2nd floor

I'm a 90% for being there (my boss might not let me go) but if you live in the area and can get over to U Street, PLEASE DO. One community meeting where they feed us light refreshments does not make up for the hours and weeks of sleepless misery. Something has to be done, whether it's soundproofing the joint or eliminating events there altogether. But the only way that'll happen is if we AdMosers (what? It could be a word) stand up. Hope to see you there!

Monday, January 3, 2011

The gift of good reviews

So.

Last week my mom had bronchitis and I had hate-my-job-so-grateful-it-snowed-so-I-don't-have-to-go-back-to-it-yet... itis? and so we spent Monday lying on the couches in the family room watching bad tv and napping.

It was amazing.

One of the shows we ended up watching that WASN'T Law and Order was an episode of Intervention where the guy was a super sad sack addict enabled by his mom who only wanted his father to love him. No not that one. Yeah, the other one. Anyway, the guy's younger brother pretty much didn't have a relationship with this dude, because, well, he was an addict and the brother was sick of it. It was sort of tragic (like they all are. And then you realize you're watching it hungrily on TV and so you are both entertained and feel slightly disgusted by yourself). ANYWAY the intervention was on this brother's birthday and he kept making this big deal about it and my mom and I took different points away from watching it. My mom thought the brother was a selfish jerk, and I felt bad for the kid because he had this brother who got all the attention and he never EVER was told that he, in fact, was actually a good kid.

We were probably both right.

And this mini anecdote is leading into the worst non-sequitur ever, which is, give good reviews. I'm on a little kick of good reviews that started way back when Joey, Maria and I went to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter.

God. That was FANTASTIC.

Anyway, we had just gone on the castle ride for the second time, and the last screen of the ride failed (yes, it is virtual. Yes, you should have known that. We Muggles cannot experience magic the way it is, we have to pretend!). Joey, who had a bad case of motion sickness, was more than fine with that but Maria and I were bummed. When we got off the ride, I told the child young lady working there that we had experienced this malfunction, and she thanked me and waved us on our way.

Yeah. Not what I was looking for.

As we walked out into the Floridian-cum-Hogwartian darkness, I expressed a teensy bit of remorse that we hadn't been offered a re-ride. Maria tentatively agreed. Joey was like - I'm going to buy more Chocolate Frogs - but Maria and I, emboldened by our mutual love for all things castley (and you know, not experiencing some serious nausea) ran back in and had a quick discussion with the head of the young lady amazing young lass at the head of the queue who said "oh! You should have been allowed back on! Let me get you to the front of the line."

Yes. Queue. What. I was in HOGSMEADE BITCHES.

Uh, anyway, when I got back to the District I wrote a short email to Universal Studios telling them how impressed I was with this early 20somethings attention to detail, customer service and general gentility. I got a perfunctory email saying thank you, we'll pass the message on, and that made me glow a little inside.

And then.

A few days later I got a handwritten note thanking me for expressing non-negative feelings. The girl's manager had been told of my comments, and I was assured she would be told and recognized for her employee-of-the-monthiness.

In not so many words.

And forget the glow - I BEAMED. It felt great! Yes that is selfish, but I don't CARE. I had helped someone who deserved it, it took me all of 1 minute, and hopefully, her karma (and mine) had gone up a little in the world.

And so.

I started to do it a lot. The hostess at Open City who is my favorite human being in the world - check. The UPS guy who, even though he wasn't delivering a package to ME, still impressed me with his waiting for my deadbeat bldg manager to come pick up the last shipment of boxes before Christmas - email AND post on company website. The young guy at the Shop Rite up north who not only dealt with my family's vague hysteria over missing fish on Christmas Eve (hello?! We are ITALIAN. IT WAS AN EMERGENCY) but then said "nah, forget it" when I inevitably got about $1 more salmon than we had originally paid for? Done. Done.

#anddone

It's a great feeling, the knowledge that you may have improved someone's day a little bit. Especially when it didn't cost you anything to do. It's the easiest way to make the world a better place (ok. Smiling is probably easier. But also, you should smile just in general cause you've got a greeeeeeeat smile). I HIGHLY recommend it. So next time someone goes a LITTLE out of their way to make your day better?

Review 'em. Review 'em well.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

My January 2nd resolutions

So.

It's no secret that I hate the concept of "New Year". In my experience, true resolutions come not from changing the year you write in your diary, or on your notepad, or in letters, but rather from failing a few (or more than a few) times to realize that change is necessary. Then once having made said realization, painfully coming to terms that change isn't easy. In fact it's damn near impossible. But the resolution comes when you stare change straight in the face and say, "alright old boy. You may win some battles. But I'm going to WWII your ass in the end."

Ok, I'm watching Dead Poets. This is gonna be a grandiose one.

Anyway, 2010 saw me make a lot of resolutions. I resolved to get help - outside help, the only kind that works - for Depression and Anxiety with capital Ds and As. I resolved to lose the weight I gained while losing the battle to D and A (and also, when rediscovering how yummy butter really is. It's SO YUMMY). I resolved to see myself as the super valuable and awesome entity separate from my family, my friends, my college, any boys, jobs, apartments, weight, height, hair color.

Mostly I failed on that one. But we push on.

However, today I come to you with some January 2 resolutions. New Year resolutions are bound to fail for me, because they really don't come from much of anything other than the media or friends or the date change asking - so. What are your resolutions this year? So yesterday I spent the day (eating. Whoops. Also!) thinking about what are some things I could change that I've realized recently need to be different.

I also went to the Georgetown game. Go Hoyas!

And this is what I came up with. Today, this random ass Sunday that is strangely warm in a winter of our discontented frigidness, I resolve to tweak a few little teeny bits of myself that will hopefully make me a better friend, sister, daughter, bridesmaid (I had to say it, it's 2011!) significant other, therapy patient, stranger on the bus, customer and human being.

Ehem. See above re: Dead Poets.

And so, without further ado about nothing, my January 2, 2011 resolutions in light of the fact sometimes the weather gets warm when you least expect and as such you should take opportunities to change yourself even if they come heralded on totally arbitrary dates.

Or, what I resolve to change in 2011:
  1. Be blunter. HAHA. I know, I'm a pretty snarky girl already. But honestly, snarky is sort of the opposite of blunt. It's easy to sit in the back of the class making snide-and-witty comments and not changing anything. It's a lot harder to sit up front and say exactly what you're thinking. So that's what I'm going to try to do. Be blunt. Kindly. And also probably a little snarkily.
  2. Be patient. It's a virtue after all. Be patient when people in my life don't behave exactly as I want them to. Be patient when I don't get the first opportunity I want. Life is not exactly a sprint (god I hope not!) but you know, a marathon. So settle in. Be patient. Most of all, this applies to being patient with myself.
  3. Write more positive reviews of things. And by things, I mostly mean people. I'm going to blog about this tomorrow in depth but for now, let's just say that it's an easy, nontime consuming way to be a better member of the human race. And so? Ima do it. Cause I like bettering myself. Also, because it makes me smile and I LOVE to smile.
That's it. That's what I plan to do starting today. And there will be pitfalls and there will be massive failures. But hopefully, on some random day in some random year (let's say... August 26, 2018) I will be able to look back and say, in the past 2793 days, I have on the whole been blunter (and not just mean) and yet more patient.

Also: I wrote a helluva lotta fanTAStic reviews.

Happy 2011 everyone. Good luck!